'Did no one tell you this itinerary was way too much?': Bride-to-be dismayed over bachelorette party of "25 of my closest girlfriends" gone wrong

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Mar 29, 2024 5:00 PM EDT

Most of us can count our closest friends on one hand… meanwhile, this extroverted bride has 25 close friends! 

If you have 25 friends or more, that's probably normal. If you're the extroverted type who befriends everyone you come across, you might have dozens of people you call your friends. When it comes to wedding planning, it's hard to narrow down that list of friends to include the ones you want to attend your big day. 

One bride who wrote in to r/AmItheA****** is going to have a lot of decisions to make about her wedding in the aftermath of a pretty disastrous bachelorette weekend. She starts right off by saying that she and "25 of my closest girlfriends" rented a place for four days to party. But from the moment this bride arrived to find the house still undecorated, she basically had a miserable time. The things she's upset about didn't seem to upset her guests---most of them seemed neutral or unbothered about the situation. As commenters explained to this bride, there's no way all 25 of those women considered her their BFF. Instead, a lot of them probably went along with the plan to be polite, only to have the bride despise the entire weekend. What a mess! 

After you check that story out, check out these very foolish managers, like one dude who "deleted the entire company's website by accident." 

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  • 01
    BRIDE BRID
    via Ibrahim Boran on Unsplash
  • 02
    AITA for having high expectations for my bachelorette party?
    via u/[deleted]
  • 03
    Throwaway and mobile account. I (25F) am getting married to my wonderful fiancé (31m) this fall. A week ago I had a bachelorette party. While most girls dream of their weddings, I dreamt about my bachelorette weekend. I put a lot of planning into this weekend, made a lot of phone calls, reservations, everything basically.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 04
    For Thursday night - Sunday morning. me and 25 of my closest girlfriends rented a house. From the start it was a disaster. I had told my girls to get to the house early on Thursday so they could decorate and set up before I got there. Well I got to the house at 3 and they weren't done decorating so that bummed me out because I wanted that "WOW!" moment when I came in and saw the set up. I felt robbed but we still had a decent first night.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 05
    Friday I woke everyone up at 7am to make breakfast and get ready because we had a packed day - vineyards, boat, lunch, happy hour drinks, then dinner and the clubs. I was getting shaded on all afternoon because people said they were being rushed from place to place and had to carry changes of clothes all day but we only had limited time in this city and I wanted to make the most of it.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 06
    Saturday was worse. We had brunch at 9am and no one was awake in time so it only ended up being me and a few loyal bridesmaids. We went shopping after for a few hours and when we got back to the house no one was even apologetic even though I was close to tears all day. The last straw for me was later that night when we were going to dinner and nobody was wearing the matching shirts we got for the weekend. People wanted to wear their
    via u/[deleted]
  • 07
    own stuff but that's not what we agreed on even though my MOH notified everyone. At that point I said this weekend was ruined and locked myself in my room to cry. It was even worse when I came out a few hours later and half the girls had gone out anyway (without me, AKA the actual bride).
    via u/[deleted]
  • 08
    I ended up driving home early on Sunday and left the house a mess for the girls to pick up because I was so upset. Now it's been almost a week, no one has really texted me except some bridesmaids and MOH.
    via u/[deleted]
  • 09
    I know I sound bridezilla-ish. But these are supposed to be my friends and we were supposed to celebrate me all weekend and I felt neglected and I'm just really upset. I understand these expectations may seem like a lot but i made my expectations clear to the group and they just let me down so bad. Tell me AITA?
    via u/[deleted]
  • 10
    IsMyHair... YTA for all the control and then running off crying. No, you can't control 25 other women. Your expectations were too high. Also who has 25 friends? This seems like some sorority craziness.
    via u/IsMyHair...
  • 11
    Kerostasis YTA. 25 people is not your "closest friends", that's a large group of acquaintances which also includes your closest friends. I guarantee you that not all of them. consider you to be their best friend.
    via u/Kerostasis
  • 12
    This means you were dragging people who were trying to politely support an extended member of their friend group into a huge elaborate event, where every detail had to be micromanaged for your personal benefit. You even complained that some of them did. their own thing while you were pouting and hiding away from everyone, rather than sit patiently at the door for you to once again grace them with your presence. Yes, you do sound like a Bridezilla.
    via u/Kerostasis
  • 13
    OrangeCubit YTA you aren't describing a - "party". A party lasts a few hour, you had a FOUR DAY WEEKEND. People had to book multiple days off work for you. And surely this is a typo, you stuck 25 people in a single house??!!
    via u/OrangeCubit
  • 14
    IsMyHairShiny Also you better not be waking me up at 7 and 9 am on a weekend after making me go out the night before
    via u/IsMyHairShiny
  • 15
    halfadash6 YTA. Did no one tell you this itinerary was way too much? You made your "expectations" clear, but did you not think at all about what everyone else wanted? | know it's "your" weekend, but that doesn't mean you get to cart everyone around like a kindergarten class.
    via u/halfadash6
  • 16
    notlucyintheskye YTA - This screams "Bridezilla!". Yes, a bach party is meant to celebrate you, but good lord. These are meant to be your friends, not your servants who are to cater to your every whim and fancy.
    via u/notlucyintheskye
  • 17
    Veilchengerd YTA. A hen do is supposed to be fun for everyone involved, not just for the bride. Which is why it is usually planned by other people for her. You just ignored everyone's wishes to go with the "this is my special day, before my other special day" shtick. I'm looking forward to your inevitable post about your actual wedding, that one's going to be a banger, too.
    via u/Veilchengerd
  • 18
    BlanquitaNJ1 I can't believe you wrote all of this and did not realize yes, you're the Brunch doesn't start at 9 am. You're the Ahole and a bridezilla.
    via u/BlanquitaNJ1
  • 19
    GlitterSparkleDevine I know I sound bridezilla- ish. No "ish" about it. You planned a bachelorette weekend that your guests had no say in (your post implies you told your guests what was expected but didn't ask if they were okay with that). And then you got all butthurt because they didn't fall in line and keep their opinions to themselves over you literally dictating their every move during the weekend. YTA
    via u/GlitterSparkleDevine
  • 20
    poetic_justice987 INFO Were you footing the bill for all these activities plus house rent? If not, YTA
    via u/poetic_justice987
  • 21
    madeline... YTA A bachelorette party is supposed to be a fun celebration, a natural extension of how your closest friends want to celebrate you. It's morphed into some ultra-high stakes of spending, with too many people feeling pressured to spend money or do things that don't feel authentic.
    via u/madeline...
  • 22
    It sounds like nobody was truly into what you were planning and it they didn't let you know until it was too late. This is often why bachelorettes don't plan their own party because if it's a MOH doing it, people are more likely to be like "I don't like these matching shirts" or "I don't want to maximize the day by rushing from place to place."
    via u/madeline...
  • 23
    Someone should have felt able to tell you that your expectations were just too much for this particular group. Your expectations would be too much for many groups. Most of us don't have 25 people who want to spend the whole weekend exhausting themselves celebrating us. Your own high expectations robbed you.
    via u/madeline...
  • 24
    Edited: I thought maybe this was a misunderstanding, but your comments made it clear you don't care about your guests or what they want at all. Changed from II "everyone because the problem here is your attitude.
    via u/madeline...

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